He is not worth it--even a cent

Oh, postingan ini tentang sang lelaki rupanya.

He is not worth it, lho.

Tapi cuma dia yg berhasil menambahkan teori baru drama percintaan gw; saat udah ga bisa mencintai, keputusan paling baik untuk menyelamatkan hati adalah dengan membenci. What is THAT supposed to mean? The only reason why I'm "mov-hate-ing" is because I can't tell u; "don't bugging me, just move away and lost!" I really can't tell that words..

Someone says, "Kalo lo kesel, tapi ga bisa marah, itu tandanya lo MUAK". VOILA! Itu yang terjadi saat ini. Ada 1 rasa yg ga bisa gw jelasin, ga ada alesannya, ga bisa dikeluarkan sebagai perkataan maupun perbuatan.

M.U.A.K

I'm behaving like I don't love him, but surely I don't know what I feel. I'm such an awful liar.

Gosh.
I.
Am.
So.
Pathetic.

Something's wrong here. Seriously, gw sampe ga ngerti software apa yg terinstall di otak gw saat ini. Think that I will build a bridge and get over it! Over it.

Pernah ga lo ngerasa otak sama hati lo ga berjalan beriringan? That's not funny. I love him, for heaven-heart's sake. I hate him, for hell-brain's sake. Not funny at all. Ya kan? Loving someone, a lil' bit sentimental for me, actually. Banyak bngt ketakutan tak beralasan sekaligus tak penting yg seharusnya udah gw prediksi dari awal. Dia seharusnya ga pernah bilang hal itu. Dia juga seharusnya ga pernah bertindak begitu. He shouldn't be. Because it's about, none other than: himself.

Tired. Period.

(Sumpah, semua paragraf ini gw tulis secara spontan dan tak terarah, I just can't write down my feeling into a good script, diary or something)

Done! Let's just skip this blahsh*t and go sleep! :)

*i know, the problem is me, I'm sorry*

September 2009. 00:56.